One day last year one of my dearest friends asked me to do a soul retrieval on her husband. A soul retrieval is when a Shaman ventures into the Underworld in search of pieces of the person’s soul that may have fractured off during a massive trauma or loss. The soul does this to preserve itself. The Shaman can go in and ‘bargain’ with the Soul Fractal to come and return to the Whole soul, so that the person can better complete his or her plan he or she agreed to prior to the person’s birth. I tell clients people should do this when they or a loved one “haven’t been the same since _____(enter traumatic incident here)” Usually a traumatic loss, abuse or crash or some sort. Some people suffer very difficult lives and have many pieces of Soul Fractals that have broken off and need to return to the whole.
I’ll call this client Bonnie, for privacy purposes. Bonnie’s husband suffers from depression. His ‘bouts seemed to be getting deeper and longer and she was worried. I’ve done an illumination on him before, so when Bonnie approached her husband with the idea, he agreed. I told Bonnie that if she brought over a dozen donuts I’d knock off fifty bucks. Soul Retrievals are my most expensive service I offer. One, because it takes me almost five hours and two because I myself am putting myself in harm’s way. I am at risk of spiritual attack and can get “stuck” in the underworld.
Believe me, I KNOW this sounds insane, and I promise I am not making this up (and I have psychologist who can prove I am very much a sane person, despite all these crazy happenings which make up my life, lol)
So, what is SO crazy about this day is that I opened Sacred Space early in the morning. Usually I wait until my children are off at school and my home is dead quiet so I can focus without interruption. Bonnie wasn’t supposed to come over (at all)! She was supposed to bring me my donuts during pick up time in the parent-pick-up lane. So I was surprised when she said she was coming over immediately after dropping my youngest off at school.
Bonnie came over and looked like crap! Her color was off, her eyes looked lifeless and everything about her energy just said “empty.” She was sweet and handed the donuts over and I asked her “are you ok?” She explained that things at home were difficult and she felt “done.” Her husband had lost his mother and father and she felt it was finally hitting him, causing a very deep, deep depression episode. For “some” reason I asked, “well, would you like me to resurrect the dead so you can talk to your mother-in-law and make peace with her?” She said “no, that’s not necessary.” I asked, “Are you busy? It doesn’t even take ½ an hour.” She agreed, reluctantly and we went upstairs where I had set up Sacred Space earlier that morning. I asked her to sit on the floor, where I had my mesa set up for the Soul Retrieval Ceremony and went to get my reference book and COULDN’T BELIEVE what I saw! My GIGANTIC reference folder that my Shaman Parents gave me was OPEN TO THE RAISING THE DEAD CEREMONY PAGE!!! That reference book has HUNDREDS of pages! I’ve NEVER opened it up to that page, as I’ve not yet had a reason to call anyone forward to clear the Hucha (heavy energy)!! I couldn’t believe it. I was shaking in delight! I said “Bonnie look! It’s already open to the page! You are SO meant to be here and do this right now!” And she wearily grinned to entertain my delight.
I began the ceremony which consists of me giving the Soul of the person who has departed permission to use my body to speak, and allow them to say anything that will clear the air… basically to settle any unfinished business. Think Whoopy Goldburg in the movie “Ghost” where Molly is given the opportunity to feel Patrick Swazy and they dance and she “holds” him one last time.
What I found interesting about this, was when the soul of her mother-in-law showed, my energy was very dominating. In the past- in the beginning of my spiritual journey – before I understood I was a channel- the ‘other’ soul would take over and I wasn’t in control (SUPER ANNOYING, let me tell you!) THIS TIME, as a fully trained Shaman, I was mostly here, and gave her only about 30% of my body. Usually the ‘other soul’ takes over 99% of my body and I’m not in control at all- it’s like I’m pushed into a corner of my body and someone else is in the driver’s seat. Very bazaar and unsettling. Anyway- I’ll call the mother-in-law “Mary” from now on.
Mary showed up and felt very gentle, loving, yet heavy. She too, in this life, suffered from depression and would ignore her children during her depression spells. Bonnie believes Mary is to blame for many of her husband’s behaviors, and his inability to show affection. I could feel how much Mary loved and appreciated Bonnie and the way she cared for and loved her son in their marriage. Mary first spoke her thanks and then let Bonnie speak. Bonnie wept from the depth of her soul. She emptied every single ugly thought she ever had of her mother-in-law. After that, I asked her to thank her for everything she did, for no matter how she raised her son, she created Bonnie’s husband and their journey has been perfect. Bonnie’s husband’s childhood was perfect for what both Bonnie and her husband have been born to learn, grow and accomplish in this life. So Bonnie did, she thanked Mary for birthing her husband, for loving him in the best way she knew how. Bonnie emptied herself of every good and bad thought she’d ever had. Mary then apologized for her “wrongdoings” in this life. She apologized and her “sorry” felt so giant and deep and real inside of me. The “sorry” was followed by more thanks and verbal “I love you,” to Bonnie. In this moment, it felt as if a VERY heavy energy went from Mary to Bonnie. Bonnie then doubled over and began vomiting. I let Bonnie clear her body of all that she had just emptied herself of, while I closed the ceremony and sent Mary back to where she came from. Mary left, feeling much lighter – the burden having been lifted from her soul.
I then turned my attention back to Bonnie, who was still emptying her stomach and began the process of capturing whatever heavy energy had transferred over to her. I asked her to lay down and felt “it” on her lower right rib cage. It felt like a ball. Like a baby demon fetus, just latched on and feeding on her. I got out my extraction crystals and cut the connection, which resulted in the ‘heavy energy’ running all over her body, trying to escape my vogule crystal.
I chased it down her side, up her leg and finally up her right arm and in her hand. I did not touch Bonnie and performed all of this while she was still wincing in pain, eyes closed. When I got it to her hand, she loudly said, “ow! My hand hurts so bad!” And I simply smiled quietly, in amazement that she could feel this exactly as I could feel it.
The “baby demon” was sucked into my crystal and the SECOND I felt it was completely captured, Bonnie was IMMEDIATELY thrown into a euphoric state. She said “OH MY GOD! I FEEL SO AMAZING!” And I softly said, “Good. Lay still and stay in this energy. I’ve got to get rid of this.”
I finished up the process of eliminating this energy from my crystal- duh, I don’t want ten thousand demons trapped into this crystal, I’ve got to send it somewhere! And once I did I went over to Bonnie’s body and cleansed her with Sage and Holy water and said prayers of continued protection over her.
As I did this she was behaving in a way that I believe someone high would look like. She was SO HAPPY- like- orgasmically happy. It was a fascinating delight to watch and I appreciated the change of energy in the room, as it had been very heavy up until this point.
I let her lay like this for a while- she deserved it! She’d done and released so much and had been so sad and heavy for too long! Eventually I told her I had to move on to her husband’s soul retrieval and close up this part of the ceremony. She had to be brought back to reality and she said “aw! But I want to stay like this! Why can’t I stay like this?” I giggled and said, “Because you have to be able to function as a human and continue to do the work you came here to do.” After a few moments, and my moving along in ceremony, Bonnie’s energy shifted back to her normal, lovely energy. Her eyes had light in them again and she felt so good to me. As if life had been breathed back in to her.
“What do you think that was? It’s like I could feel something attached to my side! It hurt so bad! Then my leg hurt then my arm and my hand hurt!” I explained what I felt, but before I could finish my sentence, she said “it’s like there was a baby demon attached to me.” I gasped and then smiled, shook my head and said “yeah! That’s EXACTLY what I felt!!! That’s amazing that you’re sensitive enough to have felt that! I believe what happened with your mother-in-law was that she had carried forward a curse. And when you talked to her, it seemed on some level you agreed to take that on for your family- for his side of the family. You took the curse unto yourself, allowing her to move forward in the afterlife. You allowed Mary to move on with only light in her soul, there wasn’t a shred of ugly or heaviness in her. It transferred onto you and I guess it was time to Mique (change and dispose of) that energy. You took it for your girls, for your husband, for your mother-in-law. You’re like- a hero, almost. You took it for them, so it ended today. Whatever that was- a familial curse- it ended with you. It’s over.” She sat, listening to my intuitive hits with light in her eyes.
She was back. My lovely, beloved, sweet friend was back and whatever this heaviness was, was gone and it was over.
I performed her husband’s Soul Retrieval and the result of that has been that her husband’s depression spells have been further apart and much less.
I’ve not physically seen him since this, so I can’t say first hand how he looks and if I think he “feels” better to me, I can only go on what my friend tells me.
All I know is that this work is an honor and it’s humbling- that I, a bastard child from a teeny, poe-dunk town, is allowed to do this work and go into unseen places to help the souls of God’s children is an honor that I am so grateful to be able to do.
Crystals Mystical Journey 